Our Investments
I came across an interesting phenomenon this past weekend. I was hanging with a group of friends and one of the guys was going crazy over this girl that he had recently ended a relationship with (forgive me, I’m not sure if she broke up with him or vice versa). Anyways, both of them have sex with other people, get mad at each other and generally treat each other like shit and yet they go back and forth not being able to let the other person go.
Now we have all been there before where we just can’t let someone go immediately, but hopefully we understand that over time the pain becomes less and less. It doesn’t completely disappear because some feelings just don’t go away along with memories. In this case though I was having a hard time understanding why he was so into trying to get this girl back. Every time I go out with him he has beautiful women throwing themselves at him that are more attractive than the girl he wants. Yes, I know, looks aren’t everything, but if you are being treated like shit and you have women worshipping the ground you walk on you can at least take some therapy from that.
I didn’t gain a full understanding until we just started talking in general about what he had done for her over the past couple of months. Did all the right things a man should do in a relationship with a ton of extras. He boasted about how he moved all her stuff in by himself and set up her whole room and then it hit me. It’s not that you want the person back necessarily because when you think about it, the relationship sucks. As men we often times want our investment back.
Women love to bitch and moan about how we are dogs and how we can simply bounce from chick to chick without getting emotionally involved and this is part of the reason. If we don’t have to invest in anything than we don’t lose anything. It sucks for women, but this is part of the male psyche. If we do invest ourselves into a woman only to have it taken away from us we transform back into the dogs that they like to complain about.
As men though we need to realize when we are doing this to ourselves. Once a relationship is fucked up, there is no chance of getting that investment back. You are just making things worse by trying to patch up something that is beyond repair. Once you understand that your investment is loss you can move on. There will still be feelings, but at least you have the understanding that you aren’t trying to win her back, you are simply trying to figure out a way that everything you put in doesn’t go to waste.
It is too easy to get caught up in remembering everything we have done and went through for a women while forgetting everything that went wrong. The reason we aren’t with someone is because all that wrong outweighed the right. Investments get lost, it just happens in life. The point is you can always invest in another and when that reaps you more benefits than you can handle you will laugh at the bad investments…as long as you learned to let them go.
3 Responses
liza / 10.21.08
Sounds like this could hold true for most guys I know. It is true that eventually the investment will payback in dividends.
Women Are Like Trophies » pTickle / 10.21.08
[...] as I spoke yesterday about relationships being investments there is something else that men need to realize about women and how we view them. If you have been [...]
pTickle / 10.21.08
For any guy that has put the time in and got left on the corner I think it applies to them. So that means maybe 97% of the men out there who have been in relationships.
Leave a Reply
pTickle is proudly powered by WordPress | Entries (RSS) | ©all time pTickle